He Loved Her

The Vine

The story leading to this verse is remarkable for what it does not include: Isaac and Rebekah had never met before this moment, their marriage arranged through a servant sent specifically to find a wife within the covenant family. There was no courtship, no gradual falling in love beforehand. The verse states plainly: he loved her, after, not before, the commitment was made.

This is worth noticing in a culture that often assumes love must precede commitment, romantic feeling as the necessary foundation marriage is then built upon. Isaac and Rebekah’s story suggests a different, equally valid order: covenant commitment made first, in this case even through arrangement, with genuine love then growing within and after that commitment.

This does not diminish romantic love or suggest arranged marriage as a universal model. It offers something more specific: love is not only the spark that ignites commitment. It can also be the fruit commitment itself produces, chosen and cultivated within a covenant already made, growing deeper specifically because the commitment came first and gave it room to grow.

If your own marriage’s love has felt thinner than you expected on your wedding day, consider Isaac and Rebekah’s order. Love can still be growing, cultivated within the commitment you have already made, not only the feeling that was supposed to precede it.